Feb 16, 2008

Foxxy Madonna VS. The Black Death

Imagine an award winning short film. I can, I've reviewed many. Just imagine watching one, where you are confused as to how it has a 9.6 rating on IMDB. That is exactly my emotions towards this film. To name off the things i disliked about this film would be most of my review. To start off, the film calls itself an "exploitation" film. Note this, Foxxy Madonna doesn't exploit anything except maybe a mute, but he is the only thing worthy to talk about.

This film is a brash, and juvenile attempt at making a blaxploitation film as well. I guess the director didn't realize that Foxxy Madonna should have been black. The only character that could have brought any urban feel to this film was the token black character, "The Black Death". Of course, by making him urban, they just have him running around on camera with a gun calling Foxxy a "Bitch". The film has been applauded for it's inventive action scenes. Does this include the horrible shot gunfight scene? Which lasted two minutes?

No action at all. The plot is a mess as well. This would have been fit for a horrible film instead of a horrible short. In the beginning, we see Foxxy Madonna (A renegade secret preacher agent) about to kill some vampire will-smith creature which resembles the Dark Seekers off of I Am Legend. She kills him with holy water, drinks it, then lights a cigarette. Yes, this is the only scene which could give her the "kick ass" feel as she is so notably given.

To call Foxxy Madonna badass would be like saying Wes Craven can still make a movie. It is a blasphemy to even mutter such. When the priest said "I Kick Ass For The Lord" in Dead Alive. That was awesome. When they try to make Christianity look stylish, it is insulting. The characters were all horrible. None of them could act except Jomar who played The Black Death.

This is not exploitation. Putting cracks, grit, and hairlines in a film DOESN'T make it "Grindhouse". There is no nudity, drugs, sex, blood, or any real violence. Only the Chalk character is interesting and to top it all off, it has a forgettable soundtrack. The worst part is, is that it wasn't even entertaining. If you like watching people in their mid-thirties fire guns in a warehouse with empty boxes while moving at really slow speeds while smoking cigarettes, then this is your film.


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